Obsessed

So, I guess you could say I'm an "extremes" kinda girl. I either love it or hate it. I'm either all in or not at all. There's not a lot of grey areas here. I make commitments and don't break them. I prioritize and stick to it. Not that my priorities are always in the right order, but at least I stick to it! I set goals and achieve them. It's just what I do. I'm strong willed, sometimes also known as stubborn.

I'm currently working on preparing for my youth group's annual girl's retreat. In case you didn't know, I am very active in my church's youth program. I've been leading the youth with an increasingly amazing team of adults (who are so not grown ups!) for the last 5 or so years. I LOVE that group of people friends family! Most of the kids are pretty cool too :D Anyway, this is our 4th year hosting the girl's retreat in OCNJ. We usually have a pretty good turn out, I'd say 50-80 people including leaders.

 2011 Girls Retreat - "Chosen"

The official Welcoming Committee 2012 Girls Retreat - "Woven" 

Anyway, the theme for this year's retreat is "Obsessed." (Making Christ the Desire of You Heart.) This year will be the first year that some of the leaders will be preparing and presenting lessons, (we've had a "speaker" in past years) and I'm grateful to have the privilege of being a facilitator. Now, I've taught Sunday School for several years and youth group lessons pretty frequently and it's not something I stress over. I'm a procrastinator by nature and usually wait until a few days before to prepare my lesson. I work better under pressure. This, right here, is a different beast my friends. This is BIG. This is 8-10 hours of work right here. Please don't think I'm complaining. I'm not!! I'm excited! But, I'm a tad overwhelmed at this moment. There's a whole month until the retreat and I've actually started looking at the material! 

That's not the issue though...

I'm sure you've heard the saying "you are what you eat." Not literally, of course. If that was the case, I'd be a very strange mix of every fast food/take out place in Salem County. That would not be cute. Not exactly completely figurative either, though. What you surround yourself with and what you pour into yourself is what will come out. It would probably be pretty difficult to be a happy person if you were constantly surrounded by negativity and sadness and depression. 

To kinda tie this all together, this book, Obsessed, has already started to make a huge impact in my life, and I've only finished the 1st chapter! Did you know we were made to be obsessed? What!? That sounds horrible!! But, looking back at my life, I can see it everywhere. Obsessions with boys, obsessions with fitting in, obsessions with food, obsessions with my phone!!! Now, I don't want to give too much of this away because I know some of my most favorite girls who will be attending the retreat may be reading this, but let me just say this: What if I made God my obsession? What would my life look like? Man, I don't know. I would have to give up a lot. EXACTLY Can I do that? Not on my own, I know that much already. Do I even want to do that? I wish I could confidently answer yes to that question. But get this: "Love the Lord your God with ALL your heart, with ALL your soul, with ALL you mind, and with ALL your strength." (Mark 12:30) Last I checked, ALL doesn't mean part or some or even most. It means ALL. {big sigh} 

Looks like I need to spend more time reading and praying and being obsessed with the right things and less time on my phone playing candy crush (among so many other things I waste time doing.) Would you be interested in joining me? Would you be willing to lift this retreat and the leaders who are preparing to share this life changing message up in prayer? Do you have a teen aged girl who might benefit from something like this? I want to make a difference in some one's life. I can't do that if I can't make a difference in my own first. 

It's sink or swim time people

So, I've been thinking about blogging for a while now but never did it for several reasons. 1. I don't know how much of what I have to say would be interesting to anyone else. 2. A lot of what I say seems to be taken the wrong way unless I'm saying it directly to you so I fear hurting people's feelings. 3. I'm honest. Brutally honest. Sometimes that scares people. If I'm gonna blog, it's gonna be real. 4. People might think I'm really crazy (or finally realize that I am!) 5. I don't have a ton of extra free time and I will totally use blogging as an excuse to not do other things like laundry, dishes and reading the many books I'm currently in the middle of. I think that about sums it up. But, here I find myself. I don't know anything about all the fanciness you can do with blogs, so I'm sure my formats and frillys will change eventually.
Here's the main reason I finally jumped in the pool: I've read so many inspiring blogs from friends and there's that teiny tiny chance that maybe something I have to say might inspire someone else. I'm a helper. I'm happy helping. I wanna help you!! Along with my honesty comes boldness. Sometimes we need someone to be bold and say the things we're thinking but aren't bold enough to say. I'm good at that!
I know this is all over the place but I have so much to say! I need to find the place where you say a little something about who you are and what you do so I don't have to type it all twice. I need to figure out if I want this thing to have some sort of topic or if it's just gonna be full of randomness. I'm gonna venture to guess it'll be pretty random. Kinda like my Jack Russell with ADD. Lastly, I struggle with how much sharing is too much. Do I tell you all my personal business and hope you don't think I belong in a mental institution or do I keep it more casual, only posting when I have something profound to say? Na, that's too easy. I want to push myself out of my comfort zone with this. I want to share openly and honestly. I need to just be me. I like me. Most of the time at least. Anyway, before I just continue to ramble on, I gotta go help my mini me with some homework. Thanks for reading and hopefully I can get the logistics all figured out soon and have some cool pictures and sparkley stuff. I LOVE sparkles.